Saturday, October 26, 2013

Deleted scene from Shadow of Samhain

This is a deleted scene from my novel, Shadow of Samhain. In this scene, my character, Malissa, is making coffees and her best friend, Sade, pops in for a visit. This scene was used as a way for Malissa to share her good news and to show what kind of friendship the two girls share.

Here is the scene:

“Hey, you!”
Malissa turned from the counter and smiled. She walked over to Sade and hugged her. “Hey yourself. I didn’t hear you come in.”
Sade grinned as she plopped onto one of the barstools lining the other side of the counter. “Your brother let me in,” She pouted. “But he ran away.”
Malissa returned the pout. “I sorry.”
Sade laughed. “I’ll get him one of these days!” She sighed, rubbing her hands up and down her legs. “So. What are you making?”
Malissa grinned as she turned around and walked back over to the blender she’d been throwing things into. “It’s a surprise,” she coyly answered. She grinned as she placed the lid on the blender and turned it on.
“A surprise?” Sade asked from behind her.
Malissa finished blending the ingredients before she heard Sade talk again. “Hey, I’m all for surprises!”
She chuckled as she removed the lid from the blender. “Good! Then that means I don’t have to celebrate all by my lonesome.”
She poured the drink into two transparent coffee cups then set the blender pitcher back down. She picked them up and carried them to the counter. She handed one to Sade. “Try it.”
Sade studied her but took a long swig of the drink just as she did. Malissa inwardly smiled as she noticed her friend’s surprised reaction.
“Hey, that’s pretty good!” Sade said, placing the cup down. “What is it?”
“Mocha caramel frappe. Or something close to it. I think I got it right after trying to make it a hundred times today.”
Sade blinked. “Wow, you must’ve been pretty bored today!”
Malissa grinned, trying to contain her excitement as she shook her head. “Nope! Not bored at all. Actually, I was kinda busy.”
“And that’s why we’re celebrating?” Sade asked.
Malissa leaned toward her. “I got a job.”
Sade jumped up. “All right!” They cheered and fell into an embrace. Malissa laughed as she moved away. “I now officially work at The Mighty Bean!”
“That’s awesome!” Sade nudged her. “Hey, maybe you can get me a discount sometime.”
Malissa laughed. “Sure, sure.”
Sade picked up her drink again and assumed a serious air as she held it up, ready for a toast. “To a new beginning.”
Malissa grinned, clinking her cup with her friend’s. “To a new beginning.”
As she drank from her cup, Sade thoughtfully added, “And maybe a hot date every once in a while.”
Malissa almost spit out her drink as she laughed. “One thing at a time, Sade,” she reminded after she recomposed herself. “The first thing I have to do is call my parents and give them the news.”
“And while you’re at it, clean that junk out of your room.”
Malissa thought about this. She knew exactly what kind of stuff in her room was the “junk” Sade was referring to. And, the more she thought about it, the more she realized that her friend was right. Just as it was time to put away childish things once someone grew up, it was time for her to put away her dream things now that she had her footing in the world. Now that she could actually survive on her own. She would have to survive without the dream obsession.
“Yes,” she said, considering this change. “Yes, you are probably right.”


REASON FOR CUTTING:

At first, I was thinking of using this scene at a later part of the book. But as I worked more on this new draft, I realized that this particular scene didn't work anymore, for two reasons:

1. I had to show that Sade, my character's best friend who was moving in with her, was actually trying to HELP Malissa instead of once again saying something like "They're just dreams! Get over it!" It would take something else for Sade to actually help Malissa with her dream problem, so I completely changed gears.

2. Malissa actually shares the news about her job with her family. In the final scene where this happens, a new plot twist takes place and so I decided to "kill two birds with one stone" and use Malissa's announcement and a change in the story, as well as revealing something about a character, all in that one scene.


Check out Shadow of Samhain here (with excerpt) and here (Amazon link)
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